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Hellenic Hero

The Melbourne City Forum Guide to getting the girl of your desire

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Hellenic Hero    229
10 hours ago, GreenSeater said:

Buy some popcorn and put your erect dick through the bottom of the popcorn box so when she reaches in for popcorn she accidentally touches your dick. She'll be moister than an oyster after seeing that you're an inventive cunt.

Won't the popcorn spill everywhere then??

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HeartFc    2,824

1. First problem I see is in the question. "Too scared". Thats fucking gay. Confidence is number 1 with chicks. Even if you're a fat ugly cunt, if you've got confidence you'll get your dick sucked eventually.

2. Next, identify if see's even interested in you and if she's not, ask her out anyway. If she says no, immediately ask one of her friends out. Even if her friends are fucking dugongs you'll annoying her into possibly wanting you. All girls hate each other and want what their friends have. 

3. Don't make a big deal out of it. Treat it like you ask girls out all the time. In fact you SHOULD be asking girls out all the time. Rejection makes you resilient, makes you not give a fuck and that translates very well with women. 

4. Be nice and polite but not overboard. Push and pull with girls. If you treat her like she's the fucking queen she'll lose respect pretty fucking fast.

5. If she says yes to going out don't ask her where she wants to go. Tell her you've got it planned and that its a surprise. Makes chicks 15% hornier from the get go. Who really gives a fuck where you go, make sure its somewhere you can talk. You're not a fucking baby, you'll work it out. 

 

Good luck my friend and remember all girls are fucking crazy and love dudes with a goal, a passion, something to strive for. Lie if you need to but make out that you're a motivated go getter that wants to make something of himself. Thank me when you're 3 inches deep! :up:

Edited by HeartFc
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HeartFc    2,824

Ok so I've actually read the topic now and see she agreed to go out. She's Latina. Boom! My area of expertise.

Learn some spanish dude. Doesnt need to be crazy. eg. buenas noches, por favor, Lo siento, hermosa/bonita. 

Works(ed) for me.

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25 minutes ago, HeartFc said:

Ok so I've actually read the topic now and see she agreed to go out. She's Latina. Boom! My area of expertise.

Learn some spanish dude. Doesnt need to be crazy. eg. buenas noches, por favor, Lo siento, hermosa/bonita. 

Works(ed) for me.

Hola chica guapa to her mum, sisters and friends

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Hellenic Hero    229
39 minutes ago, HeartFc said:

Ok so I've actually read the topic now and see she agreed to go out. She's Latina. Boom! My area of expertise.

Learn some spanish dude. Doesnt need to be crazy. eg. buenas noches, por favor, Lo siento, hermosa/bonita. 

Works(ed) for me.

Ok...

Any tips for telling my parents that my girlfriend is not Greek? You know how it is with wog parents....

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Hellenic Hero    229
3 minutes ago, thisphantomfortress said:

Ya dad will just be happy you're fucking, it's your mum who will be a problem 

Yeah that's true. Advice for dealing with mum?

@Tesla? You're a wog? How did you do it?

Edited by Hellenic Hero

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haz    3,113
49 minutes ago, Hellenic Hero said:

Ok...

Any tips for telling my parents that my girlfriend is not Greek? You know how it is with wog parents....

Just spray her with Olive oil

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cadete    6,142
3 hours ago, Hellenic Hero said:

Yeah that's true. Advice for dealing with mum?

@Tesla? You're a wog? How did you do it?

3 hours ago, thisphantomfortress said:

I'd like to hear @cadete's thoughts on this.

TBH I don't think Tesla parents are religious or impractical enough to think he needs to limit himself to ppl from one type of Orthodox.

However, at the same time I had a Greek Ex and her family really loved me. However, I soon came to relaize that they also thought it was a Massive Novelty that they could like a Non Greek BF of their daughter.

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Hellenic Hero    229
6 minutes ago, cadete said:

TBH I don't think Tesla parents are religious or impractical enough to think he needs to limit himself to ppl from one type of Orthodox.

However, at the same time I had a Greek Ex and her family really loved me. However, I soon came to relaize that they also thought it was a Massive Novelty that they could like a Non Greek BF of their daughter.

Yeah my mum's not that bad, but I'm not 100% sure she'll be ok.

Her parents (especially her dad) like me so that's always helpful....

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Tesla    8,175

You move fast, only asked her out last night and have already met her dad and gotten him to like you. 

Married by next weekend. 

Edited by Tesla
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jw1739    7,984
4 minutes ago, Tesla said:

You move fast, only asked her out last night and have already met her dad and gotten him to like you. 

Married by next weekend. 

All while still at school...jeez, in my day all you could expect at that age was a grope behind the cricket pavilion.

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Hellenic Hero    229
2 hours ago, Tesla said:

You move fast, only asked her out last night and have already met her dad and gotten him to like you. 

Married by next weekend. 

I've been friends with her for a few years...

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jw1739    7,984
1 hour ago, Hellenic Hero said:

I've been friends with her for a few years...

...but you were "too scared to ask her out"? That doesn't make sense to me.

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Jestr    1,234
9 hours ago, n i k o said:

Or just make sure you pull out at the right time 

Reverse gear strategy is a dangerous one. Timing is paramount 

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Jovan    3,488
14 hours ago, jw1739 said:

...but you were "too scared to ask her out"? That doesn't make sense to me.

Something smells a bit fishy about this story and I'm not referring to his finger.

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GreenSeater    3,017

Nah I totally get it. The man was just asking for advice on escaping the friendzone. Now he's going to date her and quickly realise that latino girls are crazy and he'll end up waking up with his dick cut off on his bedside table.

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Hellenic Hero    229
42 minutes ago, GreenSeater said:

Nah I totally get it. The man was just asking for advice on escaping the friendzone. Now he's going to date her and quickly realise that latino girls are crazy and he'll end up waking up with his dick cut off on his bedside table.

Yeah, that's more like it!

So do Latina girls live up to their reputation?

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GreenSeater    3,017
15 minutes ago, Hellenic Hero said:

Yeah, that's more like it!

So do Latina girls live up to their reputation?

I believe @HeartFc will be able to answer better than me, but in my limited experience with latina girls, yes.

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Tesla    8,175
3 hours ago, GreenSeater said:

Nah I totally get it. The man was just asking for advice on escaping the friendzone. Now he's going to date her and quickly realise that latino girls are crazy and he'll end up waking up with his dick cut off on his bedside table.

Just makes the story dodgier, he was that deep in the friendzone that he was BFFs with her dad and got out? :hmm: 

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GreenSeater    3,017
25 minutes ago, Tesla said:

Just makes the story dodgier, he was that deep in the friendzone that he was BFFs with her dad and got out? :hmm: 

Good point... just how latina is she? Perhaps she's worried Australia will elect it's own Donald Trump and she's realised she needs to marry an Australian citizen to keep herself safe?

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jw1739    7,984

This now sounds like the usual "girl next door" story. Pulled her pig-tails at kinder, the two Mums shared the school-taking and pick-up duties in the shiny new 4WDs, went to each other's birthday parties, off to the same high school together and now aged about 15 with his hormones jangling he suddenly notices that...wow!..she looks good in all the right places and she's a real girl!

I'm reminded of the story of the two bulls surveying a field full of cows. Let's run in and do a couple" says the young bull. "Nah," says the old bull,"...let's walk and do the lot."

Nice move, though, to take her to the tennis. Shows some class.

So, young Hero, take it easy. I read a while ago that 90% of us (both men and women) end up with the wrong person. That's because we don't know who we were really looking for until it's too late. Just don't tell MrsJW that I said that...

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Embee    2,877
16 minutes ago, jw1739 said:

This now sounds like the usual "girl next door" story. Pulled her pig-tails at kinder, the two Mums shared the school-taking and pick-up duties in the shiny new 4WDs, went to each other's birthday parties, off to the same high school together and now aged about 15 with his hormones jangling he suddenly notices that...wow!..she looks good in all the right places and she's a real girl!

I'm reminded of the story of the two bulls surveying a field full of cows. Let's run in and do a couple" says the young bull. "Nah," says the old bull,"...let's walk and do the lot."

Nice move, though, to take her to the tennis. Shows some class.

So, young Hero, take it easy. I read a while ago that 90% of us (both men and women) end up with the wrong person. That's because we don't know who we were really looking for until it's too late. Just don't tell MrsJW that I said that...

Inb4 Strider is revealed to be MrsJW's secret identity

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haz    3,113

This is the most exciting thing on this forum in the last month.

So when you going to smash that box?

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Hellenic Hero    229
2 hours ago, jw1739 said:

This now sounds like the usual "girl next door" story. Pulled her pig-tails at kinder, the two Mums shared the school-taking and pick-up duties in the shiny new 4WDs, went to each other's birthday parties, off to the same high school together and now aged about 15 with his hormones jangling he suddenly notices that...wow!..she looks good in all the right places and she's a real girl!

I'm reminded of the story of the two bulls surveying a field full of cows. Let's run in and do a couple" says the young bull. "Nah," says the old bull,"...let's walk and do the lot."

Nice move, though, to take her to the tennis. Shows some class.

So, young Hero, take it easy. I read a while ago that 90% of us (both men and women) end up with the wrong person. That's because we don't know who we were really looking for until it's too late. Just don't tell MrsJW that I said that...

How the actual fuck did you know? 100% correct!

This forum never ceases to amaze me...

I picked the tennis because we both are ranked inside the Top 100 for Under 16's and play mixed doubles together sometimes...

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Hellenic Hero    229
3 hours ago, GreenSeater said:

Good point... just how latina is she? Perhaps she's worried Australia will elect it's own Donald Trump and she's realised she needs to marry an Australian citizen to keep herself safe?

Parents born there...

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44 minutes ago, Hellenic Hero said:

How the actual fuck did you know? 100% correct!

This forum never ceases to amaze me...

I picked the tennis because we both are ranked inside the Top 100 for Under 16's and play mixed doubles together sometimes...

Fit couple, I like it

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